You really want that cookie so bad that you’ll go ahead and buy a tv, just to sink your teeth into a freshly baked cookie oozing with molten chocolate chips? I thought not.
The title of this post is an example which you’ll most probably never see. But it does serve a purpose. Many stores offer coupons which will promise you a free gift, granted that you must first buy something that costs significantly more than the free gift is worth. (It’s still business, after all…)
In case you haven’t yet caught on to the underlying moral of this weeks posts on coupons, this post will clarify that for you. (For those of you who need to know it now, the moral is that nothing is free.)
The free cookie is an incentive for the consumer to spend a little bit of money buying something they might not really need, just because the free gift is very tempting. It’s also an incentive for the consumer to choose Store A over Store B.
It surprises me how consumers go all gaga over even the most useless free items just because they’re free. Kudos to the stores for working their magic and spinning their web to sucker people into buying something just to get a miserable mp3 player (which by the way costs only a few tens of dollars or euros nowadays).
Everyone loves free stuff, right? That’s why stores love to use these incentives to lure people into spending money at their location. Because people go all gaga over the “promise” of free goods, clerks have an unnecessarily hard time dealing with people and these kind of coupons:
Nuisance #1:
Whenever there’s a coupon offer or such of this kind, there’s always the line “While supplies last” or “Limited number of free gifts available” written somewhere. On one hand it’s an extra incentive for the consumer to hurry up and rush to the store to buy whatever it is that’s on offer. On the other hand, it means exactly that. There aren’t enough of the gifts to go around. If the gift runs out, that’s it. You won’t get something else to replace the free gift. End of discussion.
Nuisance #2:
No, you can’t exchange the free gift for something else. That not how this works.
Nuisance #3:
No, you can’t return the free gift and get your money back. Why? BECAUSE IT WAS FREE!!
Nuisance #4:
The employees are not hoarding the free gifts for themselves. We’re not allowed to. So don’t accuse the clerk of keeping your free gift for themselves. The one and only time I’ve gotten to take a free gift with me from work was when we had little packets of gum that we were supposed to give out to every customer for free with every order. Thing is, we had THOUSANDS of them left over, so my boss told me I could take some as the deal had already passed.
Nuisance #5:
No, you can’t pay for the cookie and get the TV for free. That’d be bad for business. It doesn’t matter that you can’t afford the TV but you can afford the cookie. It doesn’t work that way. I’m sorry, but in case you hadn’t noticed, stores are in the business of making a profit. Just be happy that you’re getting something for free with your purchase.
Nuisance #6:
Yes, you actually do have to buy the TV to get the free cookie. I don’t care if you don’t need the TV. If you want the cookie, you need to buy the TV. Case closed.
Nuisance #7:
In order to take advantage of the offer of a free cookie, you have to buy the TV which the coupon is referring to. No, you can’t buy a cheaper TV. No, a toaster doesn’t qualify either. No, I can’t just give you the cookie because I “look like a nice guy.” No, you can’t have the cookie just because you “spent a lot of money at this store.” No, you can’t have the cookie because you “shop here all the time. People, please! Read the fine print and all the terms associated with the coupon deal!
Because you’re such a valued customer, tomorrow I’ll present you with a coupon to get something for less money. Hey, you at the back! Put down the cookie! You do actually have to buy the TV BEFORE YOU CAN HAVE THE COOKIE! Gosh…
What do you hate about coupons, either as a consumer or as a clerk?
If you have a story relating to this post, from either side of the counter, or anything to add to his chapter of The Consumer Etiquette Guide, let’s hear it!
The customer is NOT always right. If you agree with this, or wish to know what to do and not do as a consumer, please subscribe to this blog’s updates by the way of the RSS feed or email subscriptions. Thank you for shopping at The Consumer Etiquette Guide, now go and make someone have a nice day at work!
